No one should ever have to go through it alone.

September 11, 2015


My story begins in June of 2011. My husband and I decided we were ready to expand our family of 3 to a family of 4. After 2 long years of unexplained infertillity we finally got pregnant. We were so excited we could not wait to share our news with everyone! Including our daughter who had asked for years for a sibling. Unfortunately at 8 weeks 3 days for no explained reason our baby's heart stopped beating. My heart was broken! The only thing that kept me going was that I had a child who needed me and I needed to be strong for her! My husband threw himself into his work and I knew that was his way of grieving our loss. It was extremely hard. Here I was at home with my daughter and raising my nephew with no answers to why this happened. The best my doctor could do was tell me it happens. I got no other explanation. She then diagnosed me with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome with my only symptom being that I could not lose weight. I didnt have any cysts and no other symptoms.

 

At that point I worked hard on my body and my mind. I lost over 30 pounds and I was starting to feel good and myself again. To my surprise after months of taking Ovulation Detectors I fell pregnant again.On Christmas Eve I went in for an ultrasound and to check on our growing baby. Only to be devastated by the news that again at 8 weeks 3 days our baby's heart had stopped. At that point I asked my doctor to run some blood tests to see if there was an underlying problem. She looked at me and said we dont do that until you have lost 3 or 4 babies. I looked at her in disbelief. I was shocked how can any health care professional look at a paitent who at this point has now lost 2 babies and say sorry you have to lose 1 or 2 more before we investigate. I was stunned! After leaving another appointment in tears. I called my husband he suggested that I look into finding another Doctor before I make any decisions. So I did. I called and was seen on New Years Eve of 2013. She confirmed that we did lose this baby.

 

My new doctor ran blood tests and we found out that I have subclinical thyroidism. Which means I need to be on medication to keep my thyroid steady. To make sure my body is not over producing and harming a baby. After starting Levothyroxine and continuing with my healthy eating I became pregnant in February 2014! I am happy to say we are nearing the end of our pregnancy and can not wait to meet our miracle! Miscarriages happen more than I ever knew. I never thought it would happen to me. After having my first miscarriage a few friends came forward and shared their stories of loss. Its tragic and hard. No one should ever have to go through it alone. YOu should never feel ashamed for going through such an awful thing. I did not talk about or share my losses with anyone but my husband until my 2nd miscarriage. After talking about it and grieving we are all in a better place. Our daughter is 6 we cry together and talk about our babies that are watching over us in Heaven and that one day we will see their smiling faces and be able to hug them too!

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