My story is laid out on the pages of my blog,http://emptyarmsfullhearts.weebly.com/. I have one beautiful daughter, so recognize how fortunate I am, but also have endured 8 years of infertility, infertility treatments including multiple IVF cycles, and nine miscarriages.
One successful IVF cycle resulted in a beautiful baby girl growing in me for 22 weeks, only to deliver her stillborn on December 31, 2014 due to incompetent cervix, a previously unknown factor on top of our male-factor and female-factor infertility. Though I had many first trimester miscarriages before, the one I'm living today is particularly painful. Our latest IVF round was successful. We transferred a single embryo, but to our surprise, it split into identical triplets after implantation. But one by one, each lost its beautiful heartbeat. Tomorrow I will undergo a procedure to remove what is so callously referred to as the products of conception, but which I know were three more of my beautiful babies, now angels.
Our marriage, our life, our whole world has been reduced to our infertility and pregnancy losses. Even as we mourn our latest loss, we know we must finally give up and accept that science just cannot overcome nature sometimes. My heart goes out to all the hopeful and grieving parents. God bless you for letting us share our stories. This painful dose we've been served is too much by itself, but living in silence and isolation compounds the pain.