Knowing and Understanding
Miscarriage, stillbirth, infertility, pregnancy loss--Four terms that held little meaning to me until a few months ago. I'm a 24-year-old male who's definitely not thinking about having kids for some time. I know what all of these terms mean; there've been multiple miscarriages in my family. I knew that these were tragic things. I knew that the people experiencing them were in pain. However, what I knew was a purely academic knowledge, at best. So when I was brought on to hel
Comfort Is Spreading
When Through the Heart was formed two and a half years ago, our vision was to provide both education and support for pregnancy loss, but admittedly, I was more interested in the educational aspect. I had suffered my first loss just months before and was still hurting from the things people said and the way they reacted. I wanted to create societal change. It quickly became evident, though, that TTH was a source of support more than anything and, like it or not, I needed to s
A Door Has Closed--So We're Building A Window
I want to tell you a story about Beth. Beth shared a photo of three lit candles on our page yesterday morning as part of our Wave of Light Remembrance, along with an eloquent post about her losses. She didn't realize that her post would be seen by her friends and family. Her post was met with hearts and hugs and beautiful words of support and love from her loved ones. Some didn't know she'd had a loss- those three candles against the rising sun were the first they'd heard of
I want women to know that it's okay to talk about the child they lost.
I was 3 months pregnant; my husband and I were both happy about the prospect of having another child (we have a daughter who was born in 2010). April 8, 2012 (Easter Sunday) I had a miscarriage. We had just announced the pregnancy and we had to tell family and friends that it just ended. I tried to bury the pain. I tried not to think about it. I certainly didn't think people wanted me to talk about it. Then, I learned that so many other women I knew, including my mother and o
...I felt like such a failure as a woman.
When my daughter was 5 my partner of 4 years and I decided we wanted to add to our family. We tried for two years to conceive on our own with no luck before consulting our Doctor. After a sperm analysis, it was determined the issues were mine (momma). Blocked fallopian tubes and inconsistent ovulation were to blame. After a small procedure to flush my tubes, and a prescription ovulation aid I became pregnant. This pregnancy ended at 14 weeks when a routine ultrasound discover
No one told me that stillbirth was possible.
I lost my daughter at 38 weeks. Her name is Ella Michael Schoetzow. She was born on February 29, 2014. She was beautiful and I miss her. I had a fairly normal pregnancy. No one told me that stillbirth was possible. I had only heard of stillbirth with people who used drugs or alcohol. I took such good care of my daughter while pregnant. I still have no idea why she passed. Her passing has changed me forever and shook me to my core. I have guilt, lots and lots of it. Guilt that
Our grief was indescribable.
The story of Declan Eli is a, mostly, uneventful story. Harmony's pregnancy was as smooth as we could hope for. Outside some nausea and sleeplessness, there weren't any complications. All indications, from the ultrasounds and Doctor's appointments, were Declan would be a healthy baby boy. Heart tones were always strong, growth at a normal rate. Our Doctor told us our pregnancy was the least stressful she had. Then came May 24th. Harmony had a scheduled appointment, with the D
In honor of my stillborn daughter's first birthday, we collected...books on grieving...
My third child was stillborn at 41 weeks after a completely healthy pregnancy. In addition to handling our own grief, my husband and I are guiding our two living children through theirs. It is certainly challenging to raise my kids to be proud of their baby sister and to honor her space in our family when death, especially infant death, is so taboo. After my daughter's stillbirth, I had two miscarriages (one at 6wks, one at 9 wks) and am now pregnant with our fourth baby, ano
...to the moon, to the stars and back.
Me and my husband were so excited to finally be adding our third child to complete our family, we had just told our family and everyone was so excited. Two weeks prior at 15 weeks gestation my mother took us to get a 4d ultrasound my how amazing is was, we found out she was a little girl we counted all her fingers and all her toes and watched her move around and wave it was absolutely beautiful. Devastation started to hit a week later and we had no clue, I had small amounts o
This doesn't happen to me. This isn't happening to me.
I am married to my high school sweetheart and live in the suburbs of South Florida. In 2010, we found out we were pregnant quickly with our first child, a beautiful boy named Ethan who was born on June 22nd, 2011. A couple of years later, we decided to give our son a sibling. Quickly as well, we were pregnant again in November of 2013. We found out our baby was a girl and we selected the name Wylie Meadow. My son and I had painted her nursery. We decided on a surfer girl them